Friday, May 23, 2008

Birds and Bees .... Take 2!

About a month ago, I received a box from Daniel excitedly tore into it, only to find a few boxes of tampons, a bottle of Midol, and a few other odds and ends... nothing too thrilling for a 12 year old boy! What the contents did was create an opportunity for Daniel to ask me all about tampons. We are a pretty open family ~ you really have to be open and honest with your kids in this day and time. They have also covered all the bases in Health Class and have read all the best books on "those subjects" that are always hard for parents!
Daniel wanted a visual ~ Understandable as he is a visual learner. So, we opened a tampon and placed in in a cup that just so happen to be still sitting in the sink with about 1/4 cup of cold leftover coffee. Immediately, the tampon grew large and brown as the coffee disappeared from the cup. Daniel thought this was really cool but offered up his heartfelt condolences that Holly and I have to deal with this horrid experience called menstruation! He is so glad to be a boy!!!!

Fast forward a month, and Joe walks in from work with a few boxes! Daniel again pounces. He ripped open a few boxes to find a couple cool eBay purchases, but when it came to the last box ~ from ~ I told him to leave it be until our company left. He did question why... I simply said, "Personal Hygiene Products". He accepted that answer and moved on.

A few hours later, while we were eating dinner, Daniel all of the sudden remembered the box that remained unopened. He hurried to finish his last bite of meatloaf and asked to open the box... knowing that I had fibbed about the contents. I reassured him that it only contained tampons. His answer "But mom, you just got those last month. Do you really have to order more each month?" Needless to say, those of us around the table that "understand" were laughing so hard... poor Daniel... I guess it is back to the books for the Birds and the Bees... Take 2!

While typing that post... I thought of my favorite Tampon story ever! I have to share....

While living in Jakarta, I had a Canadian friend that had several teenage daughters. As with the rest of us ladies, when she returned from home leave each year, she was stocked up on feminine hygiene products. Indonesians do not use tampons... and finding them in a store was hit or miss. Anyway... my friend returned from Canada the end of one summer with a few cases of those very necessary female items. Her in laws happen to return with her to spend a month or so.

The in laws went into the guest bedroom, the tampons went under the girls' sink.

About a week after their return, my friend walked downstairs one morning to find her father in law having a cup of coffee with a huge grin on his face. He was a happy guy... but his smile was huge... she described it as being similar to that of a Cheshire Cat. She knew something was up. She immediately questioned her father in law's above average glee. To which he replied that she simply needed to step in the back yard.

Back up a few hours... there was a leak in the girl's bathroom. Their houseboy, trying to be the best "help" possible repaired the leak, but only after water had soaked everything in the bathroom. He decided to help the misses by getting everything dry before she woke up... or at least on the road to dry.

When my friend walked onto her back patio, what she saw was 2 cases of tampons that had been removed from the plastic applicator ~ strung all around the backyard like little white bells... waving in the wind. Her houseboy was drying them....

Can you imagine.... This is why her father in law was so chipper!!! I so wish she would have taken a picture! I can only imagine what her backyard looked like!!!

OK.... enough tampon stories for one blog!


Ellie said...

ok, our oldest is younger than Daniel, so you are freakin' me out :0 and crackin' me up :)

daveandmarcy said...

Oh this was too funny! I love the picture of Daniel you included here--so perfect!
Marcy in Guam